posted 2 days ago / reblog
Aug
1

"It’s been a while since I told a story, time to tell one now maybe."

Oh, so. I got invited to this fancy royal party back in Shurima when I was about 18, I only told like one other person about this. I met a nice girl at the party, and we uhh.. Hooked up for a while.”

And the next day I ended up at her place, but the thing is. The timing, it was awful, more like inhumane. But I tried to tough it out after she offered something.”

posted 2 days ago / reblog
Aug
3

"Allow me to speak for all of Shurima when it comes to bird man."

"NO ONE LIKES HIM"

posted 3 days ago / reblog
Aug
1

"Oh no."

"OH HELL NO."

"Not THIS  prick again, some emperor he was.”

posted 1 week ago / reblog
Aug
0

"Are your teeth really that sharp? I never noticed.."

"Just the chompers in the back, surprisingly enough."

posted 1 week ago / reblog
Aug
1

"And then I got dragged along to a dentist."

"I swear, she screamed the minute I opened my mouth for an exam because its ‘unhuman’ to have teeth that are sharp as a razor."

"That and I needed a ‘crown’" 

posted 2 weeks ago / reblog
Aug
1

"So I decided to go visit a doctor in Demacia for an average check up thanks to Noah for PRESSURING ME into going."

"After being questioned for about forty minutes, mainly getting asked on what the hell I eat, why there’s an enlarged vein on the side of my forehead, what happened to my arm."

"They told me I had enough salt in my blood to put the ocean to shame, and my lungs were basically clogged up from smoke and wanted to prescribe me like twenty types of medicine."

"I gladly declined. "

posted 4 weeks ago / reblog
Aug
0

"A thing about Ionians is that both the men and women look like they’re in their mid twenties until they hit sixty and over night, they magically turn into a dried up fruit."

reblogged 4 weeks ago / reblog
Aug
2

summonernova:

blacksmithfluffy:

"They screwed up on my haaaaaaircut."

"Now almost all my hair is gonee."

*squints at
"You look like a Demacian military recruit."

"Get me a uniform,"

posted 4 weeks ago / reblog
Aug
2

"They screwed up on my haaaaaaircut."

"Now almost all my hair is gonee."

posted 4 weeks ago / reblog
Jul
2

"The last time I visit Piltover while I’m on vacation!"

"He’s not even a real DJ, anyway. Fucking CDs? Come on."